I know major influences in the life of a senior in high school are supposed to be responsible, positive leaders and role models for young adults, but an inspiration is different. Inspiration itself can be derived from an event, music, or a person. While I don’t think of her as my role model per se, Britney Spears has been my greatest inspiration and influence throughout the past four years. Considering everything that she’s done and been through (including her ups, cynic...), she’s a stronger person than I thought she was before I became interested in her. Not to go all “Chris Crocker”, but she went through a divorce, had two kids, and suffered a mental breakdown – all in the media spotlight. With her 2008 album Circus, she made a definite comeback as the Princess of Pop and I have to give her props for that.
What’s ironic about the whole situation is that when she controversially burst onto the music scene in 1998 with “…Baby One More Time” in the iconic Catholic school-girl uniform, my conservative parents never let me listen to her. They thought she’d be a bad role model for girls my age, and it didn’t help that I attended a private Christian school for several years; even today, I still wonder if they secretly believe I should shy away from her. No, I don’t want to sing and dance inappropriately for most of my life and have a messy divorce, but I wouldn’t mind being a pop star and dating Justin Timberlake.
After Britney’s embarrassing performance of “Gimme More” at the 2007 Video Music Awards, her album Blackout was released that October. My dad gave me an iTunes gift card for my birthday in November. I was curious about why everyone was making such a big deal about this crazy lady who shaved her head and “used to be” a superstar, so I purchased some of her more popular songs. My friends say it all went downhill from there, but I can’t help but laugh.
My favorite song and music video quickly became “Oops!…I Did It Again!” and I began dancing after studying the choreography, but I quickly realized that I wasn’t stellar. I never took actual dance classes and I was too embarrassed to ask either of my parents for them in case they inquired why, so I taught myself in my room with a large vanity mirror I unscrewed from my dresser. As lame as that might sound, I loved it. I would watch her music videos and pay close attention to the footwork and small details that would make it just right. I’d become frustrated when I couldn’t do certain steps while counting in my head and keeping in time with the music, but I slowly gained patience and a sense of balance –in more ways than one.
My friends laugh and joke about my “hero-worshipping” of Britney Spears and her music, even though it was something I was passionate about. So what if I was bad when I started out the first year? I never could’ve imagined that I’d be taking my Britney “fan-freak” role as seriously as I am now, and even the greatest were beginners once. Sometimes I can’t help but laugh at myself and think, “What have I gotten myself into?” whenever I perform, as seldom as it is. Even when I’m dancing at home, it’s something I find as a means of expression. When I’m furious and feel like shattering a mirror with my knuckles as the leading force, I dance with the music all the way up. And of course, it’s to one of my favorite Britney songs. Of course, when I need to get rid of excess energy, I choose a song matched with intense choreography from one of Spears’ tours, which can lead to “interesting” situations for me.
When I’m going through a difficult time with school, friends, family, or on those rare occasions with oh... um... A BOY, I think of Britney Spears. She’s done more than just that and it was posted all over the world, yet she didn’t give up on music. She came back with an award-winning album and went a world tour. I know that sounds really weird, but it makes sense to me to look to her for inspiration. If she had the sense and courage to keep going when everyone doubted her and laughed in her face, then I can definitely deal with jokes like “not a bad dancer: just overly white”, because that’s what I love to do.
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